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Egyptian Odyssey
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Gord Green
Galactic Ambassador


Joined: 06 Oct 2014
Posts: 2940
Location: Buffalo, NY

PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2016 12:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

First of all ...I love THE ROCKETEER!!!

The portrayals of Hughs and pseudo-Flynn were great, as was the "Rhondo Hatton-esq" villian. Although I missed Bettie Page, Jennifer Connley was a good substitute.

I have no problem with that at all. The era was portrayed in a believable manner. Now if Howard Hughs was wearing a digital watch......anachronisms are distracting.

Extrapolation is good. It is what science fiction is all about. "What if...?" is the basis of every sci-fi story.

How that "what if...?" is done is the art of story telling.

Your example of THE ROCKETEER proves my point! The characters you mention are compatable with their historical counterparts. At least enough that it puts you in the world being constructed by the story.

(By the way I own a page of the Late Dave Steven's art from the original ROCKETEER comic from the early 80's. He was an astounding artist and a great storyteller. He is greatly missed!)

And while we're at it I'd like to congratulate Metropolly for achieving THE MOST VIEWS in the original story category!!!! GO GIRL!
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Bud Brewster
Galactic Fleet Admiral (site admin)


Joined: 14 Dec 2013
Posts: 17016
Location: North Carolina

PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2016 8:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

________________________________

Terrific! Thanks for clarifying your position. I get it now. Very Happy

_________________
____________
Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)
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MetroPolly
Space Ranger


Joined: 29 Nov 2015
Posts: 188
Location: Oakland,CA

PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2016 2:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shucks, guys, you're making me blush. I suppose I should be proud I got the most responses, but it's mostly just you two.

Anyway, here's the third part. I should explain first that my writing style tends not to be linear. I write in chunks, and sometimes it isn't in order. I did what I could with this.

Be gentle.
_____________________________________

It was a simple collision, as they always are. Felix apologized quickly.

“Oh, I'm sorry. I should've looked where.”

He trailed off, embarrassed. The reply was equally polite. “Quite all right. No harm done.” He stopped. “Dr. Marshall? Felix Marshall?’

Felix stared a moment. Then he got it. “Dr. Lanbourne!"

He smiled. “No, remember I told you, it's Evan. You've been to enough of my lectures, after all.”

He was tall, this Lanbourne; well-built, and fairly strong looking. He had a broad face with light brown eyes. His sandy hair graying on the sides, making him look quite distinguished. Felix smiled, then introduced Leo and Nathan. They all shook hands warmly.

“Dr. Lanbourne is a well known lecturer in his own field “ “

“Which means, not that well-known at all.” Evan laughed. “Medieval European history isn't exactly popular.”

“But you still talk on Mythology sometimes, right?’

“On occasion. But, to be honest, I try to keep off that subject.”

Felix relaxed. “So, what are you doing in Egypt, of all places?’

“Well, mostly I'm doing research on my next talk, the Moorish influence on European culture. Should be riveting.” He smiled askew. “That explains me, now what are you doing down here? I thought you didn't care for working in the field.”

“Yeah . . . I'm down here on . . . sort of a sabbatical.” Not a bad answer. He'd think of something better later.

“Hmm. It wouldn't have anything to do with that business at the Metropolitan Museum?’

Felix started. “You heard?’

“Well, I read something about it in the back of the papers. Most of it sounded like complete rubbish, like the thief shattering the case. It's ridiculous enough that anyone would rob a museum, but during a party?’

“No, that part was true.”

Evan looked close at him. “There's something you're leaving out. What's the problem?’

“It's nothing . . . “

“Yes, it is something. It involves your friends here too, right?’

"Look, Evan, I appreciate your interest, but you wouldn't believe me if I told you.”

Evan smiled. “Try me.”

Over the next 10 minutes the boys explained, as best as they could, everything about their recent adventures. Evan sat there, looking serious.

“Well,' Felix sighed, “That's pretty much it. Unbelievable, right?’

Evan was completely calm but firm. “On the contrary, I believe it.”

Leo smiled. “Thanks for the sympathy, but it's really not your problem.”

“I know, but I'm making it my problem.” Felix stared at him.

“What do you think you can do about it?’

“Quite a bit. You'd be surprised. First, though, I have to visit someone and find out what action I should take. If you like, you can come along.”
_________________________________

The office was decorated like the rest of the spa, plants and pastels all over. Evan, leading the group, approached the receptionist. “Good day, my dear, could I see Ms. Hawkins, please?’

“Do you have an appointment?’

“Afraid not. How busy can she be? She owns the place.”

“I am sorry, but without an appointment . . . “ She smiled.

“Wait a bit.” Evan pulled a card out of his pocket and wrote something down. He handed it to the girl. “Give her my card. She'll see me.”

The receptionist went into the inner office. A moment later, she returned, surprised. “ Please go in.”

The inner office was swimming in plants and paintings of animals. The lady sitting on the desk was slim and charming, with light brown hair and captivating green eyes. Evan smiled and kissed her hand.

“Ah, my dearest Miranda, how nice to see you again!”

She kissed him on the cheek and said, “Nice to see you too, but honestly, Sire, this card!”

“What's wrong with it?’ She read it aloud.

“'Fairest Circe, will you permit a follower of Poseidon to your presence?' Really, Sire, that's silly.”

Evan shrugged. “Well, everyone says I'm a bit too grim, thought I'd lighten up. And what did I tell you about calling me Sire?’

She sighed. “Right. Sorry, Uncle.”

The boys, waiting patiently, were getting increasingly confused. Their thoughts ran thus: Sire? Circe? Are they nuts or are we?

Felix finally broke the silence. “Follower of Poseidon? Do I wanna know?’

Evan patted him on the shoulder. “Don't worry. I was joking. I am not a follower of Poseidon.”

“That's what I thought.”

“No, I'm his father.”

This time the silence was palpable. Evan smiled. “You gentlemen had better get comfortable. This could get complicated.”

He took a deep breath. “Where to start? Felix, you know your mythology. Who was Poseidon?’

Felix felt like he was in class again. “Uh, okay. Poseidon, in classical Greek mythothology was the ruler of the seas, an Olympian, and uh . . . “

“Right. And how did he get his position?’

“The Olympians overthrew an older order of ruling divinities known as the Titans, who were ruled by their father, Chronos “ “

Evan held out his hand. “Correct. Thank you for the introduction.”

To say that the boys were stunned would be an understatement. Nathan looked confused and said, “Wait. Wasn't Chronos the guy who “ “

Evan stiffened and said under his breath, “ Don't say it . . . “

“The guy who ate his kids?’

Evan sighed. “And you said it. All right, let's get that settled right now. It was a mistranslation that was exploited for shock effect. I never ate anyone. Let's leave it at that, shall we?’

The boys didn't want to get into a touchy subject, so they agreed.

“Good. Now to finish the introductions. As I assume at some point in your lives you have read the Odyssey, this is the lovely and enchanting Circe that Homer carried on about. But don't worry, she doesn't turn men into pigs anymore, do you?’

She blushed. “Of course not! Unless they act like “ “

He stared at her with mock scorn. “No. Certainly not.”

“Right. Now on to new business, the reason we came by “ other than to see you of course.”

“I was wondering . . . “

“Well, I seem to recall you mentioning running into an Egyptian princess at some point in your travels.”

She thought a second. “The girl I met during the French Revolution?’

“Unless you know any others. Problem is, she's been causing these gentlemen no end of trouble.”

“They're archaeologists?’

He nodded.

“Well, they must not be working in the field or they wouldn't be standing here, at least not in one piece.”

“She's that territorial, is she?’

“When I last saw her. Honestly, I can sympathize; she wants to protect her land from robbers.”

“While that is admirable, it doesn't apply here. After all, this isn't the dark ages.” He looked at the guys. “You aren't opening tombs with explosives or using mummies for kindling, are you?’

That was obvious, so they stayed quiet.

“That's what I thought. So, her behavior is completely unwarranted, not to mention unladylike. I decided to get involved. What I wanted to ask you, my dear, is what should I expect?’

“It's been a while since I've seen her, but I remember she has a temper.”

“So do I, sometimes. I'd rather not cause unnecessary property damage. Any chance she is open to a more diplomatic solution?’

“You mean talking? She's very agreeable to a discussion, but if she knows you're on their side . . . “

She shook her head.

“I was afraid of that. Well, if it gets physical, how much experience does she have?’

“I didn't meet her on a battlefield, Uncle, but I remember she can certainly defend herself.”

“I rather thought so. She also isn't above that lion bit your cousin Dionysus used to try . . . So, she probably won't care to settle this quietly. All right, I suppose I'll have to deal with her the hard way.”
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Gord Green
Galactic Ambassador


Joined: 06 Oct 2014
Posts: 2940
Location: Buffalo, NY

PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2016 5:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Getting even better! I like the blending of Greek myth into our reality. This is exactly what I mean when I say the key to an engrossing story is a touch of the real world.

Good introduction to the characters and great "reveal".
I'm really enjoying this!
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Zackuth
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Joined: 31 Jul 2015
Posts: 51
Location: Arkansas

PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2016 7:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is getting very good. I'm very interested in what happens next.
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MetroPolly
Space Ranger


Joined: 29 Nov 2015
Posts: 188
Location: Oakland,CA

PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 7:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, you're gonna be slightly disappointed. I only have one paragraph left of that story. I ran out of ideas and put it away.

I"ll post it Sat. if you're that eager.
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MetroPolly
Space Ranger


Joined: 29 Nov 2015
Posts: 188
Location: Oakland,CA

PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2016 3:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

okay, as promised, here's the last part of the story, At least it's as far as I got before I burned out.
___________________________________

“You don't take me seriously.”

“Frankly, young lady,” Evan said with a smirk, “You're about as imposing as a butterfly. Between that and your . . . charming personality, I can't imagine why none would want you in charge.”

She glared at him. She paced toward the front door and stopped. Then she spun around and turned into a lion.
Evan stared back at her, completely unfazed. Instead, he smiled and said three words.

“Here, kitty, kitty.”

That did it. With a furious roar, she charged at him full tilt. He didn't move, saying to himself, “ About half my family can do the same, this girl needs a lesson.”

When she got close, she leapt at him. Evan, in one smooth motion, stepped aside. At the same time raising his walking stick and as she passed him . . . WHAM! He brought the heavy head down between her shoulders, effectively swatting her down in mid-jump. She was stunned, but unhurt.

Evan looked down at the creature sprawled on the floor. With a sigh, he grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and began to drag her towards the back door, saying, “Would someone mind? I rather have my hands full.”

Leo sprinted ahead and opened it. Evan calmly hauled her to the doorway, looked down at her and said, “You should know better, wild animals are not permitted in the building.”

With that, he unceremoniously dumped her on the back steps. She was just coming around. He finally said, “And don't come back until you can play nice.” Then he slammed the door . He turned to his amazed companions and said, “And that gentlemen, is why I prefer dogs.”
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Gord Green
Galactic Ambassador


Joined: 06 Oct 2014
Posts: 2940
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2016 12:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Really, if you end it there it's a great last line for a short story.

Reminds me of a single pager in Galaxy Magazine, written I believe entitled "Through Time and Space with Ferdinand Feghoot",
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Zackuth
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Joined: 31 Jul 2015
Posts: 51
Location: Arkansas

PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2016 5:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like it! Thanks for the entertainment!
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MetroPolly
Space Ranger


Joined: 29 Nov 2015
Posts: 188
Location: Oakland,CA

PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2016 7:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're welcome. Glad it worked for you. I have other stuff, but it definitely wouldn't be of interest to this forum.
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