ALL SCI-FI

[Bud Brewster]

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I heard that a lovely blond went to a neurosurgeon and asked him if it was possible to transplant a brain into a healthy body. He told her that a new procedure had been perfected so that elderly people with failing organs could enjoy longer lives.

But he asked the young lady why she wanted to know about brain transplants. After all, she was both young and perfectly healthy.

The blond smiled, crossed her shapely legs, and said —


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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Bud Brewster]

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A wise man once said —

Being the "smartest person in the room" is only good if the other people are smart enough to give you an intelligent conversation.

Otherwise, you're just stuck in a room full of dimwits.

I'm sure we've all felt that way sometimes.
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[tmlindsey]

[Pow]

Here's a tip for keeping those pesky Halloween trick or treaters from coming to your house.

Answer your door naked.

Oh look, here come some more trick or treaters to the door and this time they're dressed as policemen.

[Bud Brewster]

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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Pow]

All right! Hydra will fall because if Agent Orange/Don the Con's in charge it'll collapse and fail like all his other business ventures.

[trekriffic]

[Bud Brewster]

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The Superhero Blues!

If you think being a superhero is all "glory and glamour", think again!
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~ What it the Flash got arthritis in this knees?

~ What it Batman suddenly developed vertigo?

~ What if Aquaman developed hydrocephalus? (Water on the brain!)

~ What if Green Lantern accidentally used his ring . . . while it was turned around backwards!

~ What if Wonder Woman got tangled up in her Lasso of Truth and somebody asked her what her secret identify was?
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Anyone want to add a few more ideas? How 'bout the Marvel superheroes!
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Bud Brewster]

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Bud's Invisible Riddles!

~ What would you call a large arctic canivor who is prone to mood swings?

Highlight the invisible text between the words "Answer".

Answer — A Bi-Polar Bear — Answer
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~ What would you get if a newly enlisted service man fell into a wood chipper?

Highlight the invisible text between the words "Answer".

Answer — Private Parts — Answer
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~ What animal literally wouldn't survive if it didn't succeed in getting laid!

Highlight the invisible text between the words "Answer".

Answer — An Egg — Answer
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Bud Brewster]

I love Westerns! And so did my Dad when I was growing up in the 50s and 60s!





But one thing about the Hollywood depiction of Native Americans I object to is the way they took the actual Indian names of the characters and translated them into English!

For example the real name of "Sitting Bull" is Lakota Tatanka Iyotake!

That's a beautiful name, and I resent the fact that Hollywood demeaned the Native Americans in those classic Westerns by making all the Indian characters have simplistic names like "Dark Cloud", and "Gray Wolf",and "Running Bear", and "Little White Dove" — who loved Running Bear, if you remember that highly sentimental (and popular) song from 1959!

And yes, guys . . . I still own the 45 rpm record.

Running Bear Little White Dove Lyrics (Johnny Preston)


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So, with that in mind, here's a few humorous suggestions for Hollywood "Indian" names which are no less ridiculous than the ones used in those classic Westerns.
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Chief Sitting Bull and his lovely wife, Sitting Pretty, plus their son who never told the truth, Sitting Bullshit

Chief Crazy Horse and his brother Chief Sweating Horse

Two Cheyenne braves: Running Bear and his allergy-prone brother, Running Nose

Three Apache braves: Walking Stick, Hiking Trail, and Dancing Fool

Four Sue warriors: Leaping Lizard, Jumping Jacks, Prancing Deer, and Hopping Mad

Two tribal leather craftsmen: Tanning Hides and his brother, Tanning Bed

Two famous Medicine Men: Hacking Cough and Drooling Idiot
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Bud Brewster]

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I can't resist adding a few more humorous Indians names! I hope you guys will get a giggle out of this.

Big Hunting Moose – A brave who was so fond of moose meat that he practically decimated the moose population in the area.

Little Eager Beaver - An attractive young Indian maiden who’s very popular with the young braves.

Chief Straight Arrow – A sarcastic name for a beloved but elderly tribal leader whose failing eyesight preventing him being able to hit the broad side of a tee-pee.

Knocking Knees - A not-so-brave Brave who’s terrified when faced by the enemy.

Chief Lazy Horse – Brother of the famous Chief Crazy Horse . . . but considerably less ambitious!
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[scotpens]

I was just reading an online review of Silver Nitrate, a new paranormal thriller by Mexican author Silvia Moreno-Garcia. The title supposedly refers to the chemically unstable and highly flammable material that was used for movie film before the 1950s.

Only problem is, the stuff she was thinking of is cellulose nitrate -- which she's apparently confusing with silver halide, the chemical compound in film emulsion that turns dark when exposed to light.

At one time, silver nitrate eyedrops were put in the eyes of newborn infants to prevent neonatal conjunctivitis. Nowadays modern antibiotics are used.

For all I know, Silver Nitrate may be a great book -- but the author needs a remedial course in chemistry!

[Bud Brewster]

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Here's a few humorous thoughts which came to me recently.
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Do masochists make good dental patients? After all, enduring pain is what they love!

Conversely, do sadists make good dentist? After all, inflicted pain is a necessary part of their profession!

And finally, here's a novel idea I came up with!

What's the best way to find a needle in a haystack?

Simple! Just burn down the haystack! That way the silver needle will end up sitting on top of the chard black ashes, clearly visible for all to see!
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Krel]

[scotpens]

A couple of weeks ago, I had lunch with my 94-year-old dad and his wife (his third) at a local delicatessen. I arrived a few minutes early and didn't see them there, so I asked the hostess if she had seen an elderly gentleman with a cane. That's when I realized I was describing half the customers in the place. I might as well have asked her, "Did you happen to see an old Jew come in here?"