ALL SCI-FI

[Gord Green]

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There comes a time, thief, when gold loses its lustre, and the gems cease to sparkle, and the throne room becomes a prison; and all that is left is a father's love for his child.

[Eadie]

We need to laugh now more than ever!



















Sign in San Francisco Walmart:



A late night store was robbed in. It had the most weird Name:





Especially for Mr. Wayne:


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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Gord Green]

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There comes a time, thief, when gold loses its lustre, and the gems cease to sparkle, and the throne room becomes a prison; and all that is left is a father's love for his child.

[Gord Green]

BREAKING NEWS:

King of Spain quarantined on his jet.

So the reign of Spain stays mainly on the plane.
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There comes a time, thief, when gold loses its lustre, and the gems cease to sparkle, and the throne room becomes a prison; and all that is left is a father's love for his child.

[Bud Brewster]

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"By George, he's got it! I think he's got it!"

(Which is why he's quarantined, of course . . . )
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Eadie]

Even Batman gets it!


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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Gord Green]

HISTORY OF TOILET PAPER


1. The first recorded use of toilet paper was in 6th Century China.

2. By the 14th Century, the Chinese government was mass-producing it.

3.. Packaged toilet paper wasn't sold in the United States until 1857.

4. Joseph Gayety, the man who introduced packaged TP to the U.S. had his name printed on every sheet.

5. Global toilet paper demand uses nearly 30,000 trees every day.

6. That's 10 million trees a year.

7. It wasn't until 1935 that a manufacturer was able to promise Splinter-Free Toilet Paper.

8. Seven percent of Americans admit to stealing rolls of toilet paper in hotels.

9. Americans use an average of 8.6 sheets of toilet paper per trip to the bathroom.

10. The average roll has 333 sheets.

11. Historically, what you use to wipe depended on your income level.

12. In the middle ages they used something called a gompf stick which was just an actual stick used to scrape.

13. Wealthy Romans used wool soaked in rose water and French royalty used lace.

14. Other things that were used before toilet paper include: Hay, corn cobs, sticks, stones, sand, moss, hemp, wool, husks, fruit peels,
ferns, sponges, seashells, knotted ropes, and broken pottery (ouch!).

15. 70-75% of the world still doesn't use toilet paper because it is too expensive or there is not sufficient plumbing.

16. In many Western European countries, bidets are seen as more effective and preferable to toilet paper.

17. Coloured toilet paper was popular in the U.S. until the 1940s.

18. The reason toilet paper disintegrates so quickly when wet is that the fibers used to make it are very short.

19. On the International Space Station, they still use regular toilet paper but it has to be sealed in special containers and Compressed.

20. During Desert Storm, the U.S. Army used toilet paper to camouflage their tanks.

21. In 1973 Johnny Carson caused a toilet paper shortage. He said as a joke that there was a shortage, which there wasn't, until everyone believed him and ran out to buy up the supply. It took three weeks for some stores to get more stock.

22. There is a contest sponsored by Charmin to design and make wedding dresses out of toilet paper. The winner gets $2,000.

23.. There was a toilet paper museum in Wisconsin, The Madison Museum of Bathroom Tissue, but it closed in 2000.

24. The museum once had over 3,000 rolls of TP from places all over the world, including The Guggenheim, Ellis Island, and Graceland.

25. There is still a virtual toilet paper museum called Nobody's Perfect.

26. In 1996, President Clinton passed a Toilet Paper Tax of 6 cents per roll, which is still in effect today. Obama tried to triple that but the House wouldn't pass it.

27. The Pentagon uses, on average, 666 rolls of toilet paper per day.

28. The most expensive toilet paper in the world is from Portuguese brand Renova.

29. Renova is three-ply, perfumed, costs $3 per roll and comes in several colors including black, red, blue and green.

30. The CEO of Renova came up with the idea for black toilet paper while he was at a Cirque du Soleil show.

31. Beyonce uses only red Renova toilet paper.

32. Kris Jenner uses only the black Renova toilet paper.

33. If you hang your toilet paper so you can pull it from the top, you're considered more intelligent than someone who pulls it from the bottom. (Wonder how this was determined?)

34. Koji Suzuki, a Japanese horror novelist best known for writing The Ring, had an entire novel printed on a single roll of toilet paper.

35. The novel takes place in a public bathroom and the entire story runs approximately three feet long.

36. When asked what necessity they would bring to a desert island, 49% of people said toilet paper before food.

37. Queen Elizabeth II wipes her royal bottom with silk handkerchiefs. Wonder if the royal chambermaid gets to wash those?


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There comes a time, thief, when gold loses its lustre, and the gems cease to sparkle, and the throne room becomes a prison; and all that is left is a father's love for his child.

[Eadie]

Additional facts about toilet paper.

Some people use the "over" method:



some use the "under" method:



It was meant to be this way according to the original patent:



Now for some humor on this fine Easter morning. Gollum's precious Green Lantern Ring:



First things first:



Superhero computer problems:



Your 1st Easter egg of the hunt:


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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Bud Brewster]

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They say that laughter is the best medicine.

Dr. Eadie is just what the nation needs.
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Eadie]

Funny Corona virus signs:











OUCH!
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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Bud Brewster]

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I posted this on YouTube today. Funny, eh?
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People are dying because Emperor Trumpatine is evil!

Join the Rebel Alliance and defeat the Republican Empire before it's too late!

May the VOTE be with you!



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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Eadie]

Kelly-Anne Conway is Stupid!!!





It would be a great public relations boon if the NS Savannah (combination hospital/cargo nuclear ship) was put into service for the poorer countries.























There was even a model kit:








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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Bud Brewster]

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There's not very much about the pandemic that could be considered "funny", but on an interview at CNN, Dr. Carlos del Rio explained why the idea of only opening up certain parts of the country before there's a vaccine could be described this way.

"Opening some states and not others is like having a designated peeing section in the swimming pool. It's not really going to protect people."

That's brilliant . . .
_________________
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[scotpens]

[Eadie]

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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.