ALL SCI-FI

[Bud Brewster]

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[Also released as: "Monsters from the Moon]

Phil Tucker's immortal classic! This is what you get when you make a movie in Hollywood's Bronson Canyon on a four-day shooting schedule for just under $20,000.

In the category of fun "bad" movies, many people feel that "Robot Monster" is more successful than "Plan 9 From Outer Space", which is so bad it's actually depressing. Furthermore, "Robot Monster" has the added distinction of a really terrible music score by none other than Elmer Bernstein (before he did "The Ten Commandments" and "The Magnificent Seven").

And it was filmed in 3 D!

George Nader leads the last six survivors of an alien invasion as they battle against one of the alien, "Ro-man" -- a fat gorilla suit with a generic 1950s space helmet that appears to be empty. The alien lives in a cave with its high-tech equipment (a war-surplus radio on a kitchen table and an active Billion Bubble Machine which gives the monster's lair the same eerie atmosphere all those terrifying Lawrence Welk shows used to have).

The devilish Ro-Man strangles a little girl and menaces the other humans until he gets into trouble with his alien boss, The Great One, who zaps Earth with a "U-Ray" (stock footage destruction galore).

If you liked Tucker's other classic, "Cape Canaveral Monsters", you'll love "Robot Monster".
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Bud Brewster]

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I'm sorry, folks, but I've tried watching this movie several times over the years, and I've yet to make it through the first ten minutes.

People have told me how much they enjoy laughing at truly bad movies like this. I've tried doing that, but I just can't get much fun out of it. It's kind of like trying to cheer myself up by thinking about all those poor people who are less fortunate than me.

It doesn't work. I just start feeling sorry for all those poor people who are less fortunate than me!

Ditto for watching bad movies. It doesn't amuse me — it just makes me feel sorry for those poor filmmakers who thought they're movie was worth watching.

Admittedly, however, the trailer is a hoot. The narration cracks me up!

With the swiftness of a deadly cosmic ray, the Earth is invaded by indestructible Moon Monsters! Their ghastly mission: death for all humans!

What astounding technological developments are being made to protect mankind? Robot Monster brings you an actual preview of the devastating forces in our future! Unsuspected revelations of incredible horrors that will terrify you with their brutal reality!"

I can just see the guy who wrote that narration, struggling to hit the typewriter keys while he laughed so hard he blew snot bubbles all over the place.

Watch the trailer and blow a few snot bubbles of your own.



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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Dr Acula]

Fast forward a little bit - when Ro Man has to start making decisions (but he canNOT) I think you'll get into the swing of things!

[MetroPolly]

try watching the MST3K treatment of it, it should at least get you through the film.

[Gord Green]

This film is SO ridiculous that the ONLY way to watch it is the MST3K version!!!

[Eadie]

Did he steal Robby's Car?


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Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable.

[Bud Brewster]

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Oh my God, not only did he steal Robby's car, he stole a case of giant cans of Coke!

Is nothing sacred to this maniacal simian extraterrestrial!
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Zackuth]

Unfortunately I am one of those who have seen the movie, nonMST3K version, twice. The first time I was 9 or 10 and thought it was a stupid movie back then. A few months ago I had an opportunity to see it again and I thought I might have judged it too harshly as a kid and wanted to see how well it "aged" and watched it.

It aged like 300 pounds of fish heads buried under a ton of manure for a few years!

I cannot believe the good taste in movies I had at the tender age of 10. The only thing worse than the first 57 minutes of the film is the last 5 minutes.

Can't you just hear the discussion between the costume designer of Ro-man and the producer/director "genius" who put this together?

Costumer: "Sir, all we can get on your budget is this old gorilla suit with no head and this silly looking space helmet."

Genius: "What a great idea! That's just the thing to give Ro-Man that other-worldly look! You deserve a bonus! Go ahead and keep the change out of that $5 I gave you to get the costume!"

I'm pretty sure the MST3K version made this schlock watchable, but I won't be looking for it any time soon.

[scotpens]

[Bud Brewster]

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Call me blasphemous, but I'm not a big fan of MST3K and I've never managed to get drunk enough to sit through Robot Monster (as least, not that I remember *hic*).

However, the YouTube video of the MST3K version has a beautiful picture, and it's a "Joel" episode rather than a "Mike" episode (a minor plus for me personally), so I might tie one on tonight and see if I can have a little fun with this infamous "classic".
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________________ MST3K 106 Robot Monster


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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[Zackuth]

[Bogmeister]

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_______________ Robot Monster (1953) trailer


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This movies is almost as infamous as Plan 9 From Outer Space as perhaps the worst sf film of all time — but, like Plan 9, there are qualifications to such an extreme claim to infamy.

Most of the film, after all, is a representation of a child's dream — that of a small boy — and many of the elements in this one are eerily appropriate when viewed in such a context.

The film begins in a quasi-reality with a small family on a picnic. They all decide to take a nap. That's when it goes off-kilter, as the boy wanders to a nearby cave, where lurks the awful Ro-Man, conqueror and destroyer of Earth's populati!

We are now in the boy's dream — unless we haven't figured that out. And, the weird tale fits in with a small boy's conception of what an invasion of Earth would be like — all revolving around his family and the immediate area (mostly filmed in Bronson Canyon, where many low budget efforts were filmed).

Things were already weird before the dream, including the uncomfortable spot where they all decided to nap for some reason.


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However, as a dream, it mostly works: people in reality become different in their relationships in the dreamworld.

A mere acquaintance prior to the dream — a professor — is now the father in the dream.

Mother and daughter wear the exact same dresses — and the daughter looks a lot better. A young man and woman work on an electronic transceiver, and all we see are their hands as they work and speak, with the woman dominant and in charge.

The young man is played by studly George Nader, who gets shirtless just as Ro-Man puts the kibosh on him — as the just-married couple begin their honeymoon. Ro-Man has already killed the little girl by this point. Then, there's a near rape.

But suddenly the Great Guidance puts an end to the plot by ravaging the Earth even more with his electric rays and stock footage. Ro-Man never gets the girl, although she might have acquiesced eventually, because she found Ro-Man to be very strong.

BoG's Score: 2 out of 10

Robot Trivia: an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 in its first season - Episode #107


BoG
Galaxy Overlord Galactus

[Bud Brewster]

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Here, friends and neighbors, is definite proof that Bogmeister (aka the late Andrew Bogdan) could find interesting things to say about a movie that I would simply dismiss as "bad" and never bother to really analyze it the way Andrew did.

As I said earlier, I've never manage to watch more than a few minutes of this movie, so I had no idea that it has two — yes, TWO — things in common with Invaders from Mars. Both are allegedly the dream of a young person, and both are 3D!

This movie might a cinematic snooze, but Bogmeister's review is very enjoyable.
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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)

[tmlindsey]

This is one film that I've never seen. I've seen it offered on some streaming channels lately and am tempted to dive in, just to finally see it.

I mean, how bad could it be? After all, I watched Ghostbusters: Answer the Call twice
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"Have you never wondered what it would be like to walk between the ticks and tocks of Time?"

[Bud Brewster]

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_____________________ Robot Monster-1953


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Hey, kids! Now YOU can have your very own Super Lectric Vaporizer, just like the one Robot Monster uses! Click here for details. Act now, supplies are limited!

(In fact, there's only one . . . )

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And be the first kid on your block to own a genuine Super Lectric Space Heater, made by the Superior Electric Products Corp (UNIT #16).

It's just like the one Ro-Man uses to keep his big hairy toes warm in the cold reaches of outer space!

Click here and order yours today!


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Is there no man on Earth who has the wisdom and innocence of a child?
~ The Space Children (1958)